Sounds like you may need a cable kit or new LCM. BMW usually offers retrofits for LCI headlight/tail lights.
I know for the E60 if you have an 04-06 5er and want to get 08 headlights & tail lights you need to buy a cable kit and a new LCM and then wire it up and get it reprogrammed. For 07 5ers you only need the cable kit and reprogramming.
E60 M5 6MT; E46 M3 6MT
E46 330CiA; E36 M3/2/5; E60 M5 SMG
B8.5 Audi S4 6MT