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Old 11-07-2012, 07:31 PM   #61
eee4666
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Neighborly approach: Take "Cornbread" some fresh baked cornbread.

Turf war: Start tagging your garage door and wear red to show dominance.
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Old 11-07-2012, 08:13 PM   #62
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When you approach cornbread pronounce it "cawn-brid" then when he corrects you just say "that's what I said cawnbrit"
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Old 11-07-2012, 08:18 PM   #63
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Next time you wave, just stare and keep waving until they do something. If nothing, flip them off and leave
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Old 11-08-2012, 04:09 AM   #64
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Tell'em you voted for Obama...that'll get you in tight with the brothers..
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Old 11-08-2012, 05:07 AM   #65
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Get them some cornbread, grape soda, kool aid, KFC and a watermelon and they'll love you forever.

On a serious note they probably see it as you moving into their neighborhood, so there just scoping you out to see if your a problematic type of guy.
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Old 11-08-2012, 05:43 AM   #66
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next time they're watching you, partially unzip your pants and pull your balls out before waving back
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Old 11-08-2012, 06:23 AM   #67
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why i'll never buy again, unless it's surrounded by woods, you could have the nicest house and the neighbors would still make it hell, it's a gamble
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"Mommy and Daddy are getting a divorce now because wasp9166 had to piitb with Mom."

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Old 11-08-2012, 07:43 AM   #68
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Old 11-19-2012, 12:37 PM   #69
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Over the weekend I met cornbread and his friend Kenny who is of equal intelligence. Looking out my window Sunday, I noticed a beat up pickup truck parked in the parking lot next to my house with 2 guys sitting in it. About 45 min later they were still out there and I noticed the 2 guys drinking and smoking. I decided to take my trash out to get a better view of the situation, turns out it was my man Cornbread and his friend (who is also a neighbor) Kenny. Being a friendly neighbor I went over and talked to them for about 20min. They are both very nice guys but I found it strange they were haning out in a pickup in a parking lot drinking when both of their houses are directly across the street. Cornbread is pushin 250llbs and had about 5 teeth and REALLY had trouble getting complete sentences out. Kenny is basically a spitting image of Adam Sandler's character in Billy Madison (for some reason Kenny was wearing a suit at 5pm on a sunday, maybe he's REALLY into church who knows) . The first thing that cornbread told me about was how he changed Ronda's (the girl who lived in the house before me) flat tire one night and she owes him a pie or atleast a look at her tits....he wanted me to check on this for him. When I told them I was from Nebraska, Kenny made a comment about "the whole Jerry Sandusky thing goin on there is a shame". WTF, I wish I could have recorded this conversation.
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Old 11-19-2012, 06:06 PM   #70
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"if polarity comes from protons, does morality come from morons?"

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"Mommy and Daddy are getting a divorce now because wasp9166 had to piitb with Mom."
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Old 11-19-2012, 06:14 PM   #71
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I agree with JonJon.
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Old 11-19-2012, 06:15 PM   #72
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why i'll never buy again, unless it's surrounded by woods, you could have the nicest house and the neighbors would still make it hell, it's a gamble
<3 tract homes
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Old 11-19-2012, 06:16 PM   #73
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Over the weekend I met cornbread and his friend Kenny who is of equal intelligence. Looking out my window Sunday, I noticed a beat up pickup truck parked in the parking lot next to my house with 2 guys sitting in it. About 45 min later they were still out there and I noticed the 2 guys drinking and smoking. I decided to take my trash out to get a better view of the situation, turns out it was my man Cornbread and his friend (who is also a neighbor) Kenny. Being a friendly neighbor I went over and talked to them for about 20min. They are both very nice guys but I found it strange they were haning out in a pickup in a parking lot drinking when both of their houses are directly across the street. Cornbread is pushin 250llbs and had about 5 teeth and REALLY had trouble getting complete sentences out. Kenny is basically a spitting image of Adam Sandler's character in Billy Madison (for some reason Kenny was wearing a suit at 5pm on a sunday, maybe he's REALLY into church who knows) . The first thing that cornbread told me about was how he changed Ronda's (the girl who lived in the house before me) flat tire one night and she owes him a pie or atleast a look at her tits....he wanted me to check on this for him. When I told them I was from Nebraska, Kenny made a comment about "the whole Jerry Sandusky thing goin on there is a shame". WTF, I wish I could have recorded this conversation.
Wait. I am confused. So they are white trash? I thought they were ghetto hood rats?

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Old 11-19-2012, 06:22 PM   #74
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My dad drove a 1995 Pontiac Bonneville until about 2001. He was a landlord (slumlord) and the people there asked if it was a Mercedes because they perceived that he had money and it was a large sedan. He thought it was hilarious when he told them that it was a Pontiac.

People are dumb and make a lot of false assumptions about cars. Driving a luxury brand confuses people, even if the car is 10+ yrs old and cost less than a years worth of bus passes.
oh god.... everyone knows the acronym for pontiac.... just swap in mercedes, where cadillac would go.
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Old 11-19-2012, 06:28 PM   #75
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Set a lower case t on fire on there lawn for "time to leave"

And if you really mean business, try a capital T

Last edited by GasKing; 11-19-2012 at 06:31 PM.
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Old 11-19-2012, 06:51 PM   #76
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What part of nebraska are you from?
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Old 11-19-2012, 07:23 PM   #77
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Wait. I am confused. So they are white trash? I thought they were ghetto hood rats?

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Cornbread is like a black version of white trash. I'm not sure where to classify Kenny at this point.

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What part of nebraska are you from?
Grew up in Auburn, Went to UNL and lived in Lincoln for 6 years.
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Old 12-19-2012, 03:48 PM   #78
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NEW CHARACTER: Ben
AGE: Mid 30s
RACE: White
LOCATION: Lives Below me (basically in my basement) with his wife Adrianne

I have met the people that live below me through a discrepency in the cable bill. Entire house shares one bill. Long story short: I had to explain how the internet works to ben, what a wireless router was, and why I needed to hook mine up in his house/basement dwelling in order for me to have internet. He acted like he understood it all but then at the end he asked me "So, can we both be on the internet at the same time with this thingy?" and then "If I look at something on my computer is it on your computer too or can you look at something else". Ben came up a couple weeks ago to chit chat before his wife got off work, I gave him a beer and we watched basketball. He informed me how he is a former drug addict and how his dad murdered 2 men when he (Ben) was in his 20s. Ben used to stain and seal furniture for a living, he is currently unemployed and helps Cornbread out with the lawn-care business. Ben now stops in periodically for a beer (He never brings his own) and an entertaining conversation. He's a pretty good guy just a little odd. His latest hobbies appear to be: Feeding the neighborhood stray cats, listening to super loud guitar solos with the bass turned up, and yelling at his wife. I hope Ben finds work soon.
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Old 12-19-2012, 03:51 PM   #79
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and drinking your beer, snuff that out
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"if polarity comes from protons, does morality come from morons?"

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"Mommy and Daddy are getting a divorce now because wasp9166 had to piitb with Mom."
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Old 12-19-2012, 04:14 PM   #80
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what exactly is racist about the way they are acting?

their black aren't they? just kidding
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