Am I a Jerk?

Friends of ours had their Buddhist engagement ceremony today; grooms arrival was set for 8:45 am (significance based on time, date of birth). Spoke w/grooms brother; they arrived at 8:15am and were waiting to enter brides house. My fiancee who insisted on driving shows up at my house at 9:05am, the drive there is 10-15 minutes...I refused to go; sent my gift w/her. The thought of walking in 35 minutes after ceremonies began is not cool with me.

Am I a Jerk?

yerk

edit: so I just actually read your story. Looks like your fiancee is actually the yerk for being so damn late.

So you left your gf behind because she was late? Good.

eh, I would have just gone and hung outside until it was over-then blend into the crowd. Tell the bride/groom what a beautiful ceremony it was-then go to the reception for free food/drink!

i am with you on this one. if you're not gonna be on time somewhere then why go. i feel terrible when i'm 2 minutes late to anything, it bothers me a lot when i'm late to anything.
it angerfies me when people are late.

...so, are you a jerk? to me, no. to others that don't give a fvck about punctuality, probably.

sent this to your girl:

Originally Posted by russ330

So you left your gf behind because she was late? Good.

Nah, I refused to go; would have left her; but the couple are more her friends; would have been a bit awkward being there without her; yet not as awkward as walking in during the ceremonies which involve the use of doorway (best man asks for brides hand on behalf of groom...gifts are exchanged etc...)

Edit; I worked until 2am, woke up at 6am, had a proper shave, put on a new Brioni for nothing; back in sweats now!

I hate people who arent punctual. For a wedding ceremony if youre going to be late dont bother going, your entrance will almost undoubtedly take attention away from the bride and groom which is highly disrespectful IMO. Was there a reception afterwards? I would have still gone to that.

A Brioni eh, do you pack a Walther PPK like James Bond as well?? Do you bang 3 chicks per episode? Do you drink martini's?

Originally Posted by BimmerPhan

eh, I would have just gone and hung outside until it was over-then blend into the crowd. Tell the bride/groom what a beautiful ceremony it was-then go to the reception for free food/drink!

That's a pretty good idea; wish I'd thought of it... its a cold and rainy day; I still could have hung out with the smokers in the garage.

Originally Posted by motoracergabe

i am with you on this one. if you're not gonna be on time somewhere then why go. i feel terrible when i'm 2 minutes late to anything, it bothers me a lot when i'm late to anything.
it angerfies me when people are late.

...so, are you a jerk? to me, no. to others that don't give a fvck about punctuality, probably.

Agreed 100%. Even as a kid if I was even a minute late to school; I'd wait till break/the next class to enter the room...basic respect.

Originally Posted by NJ///M

I hate people who arent punctual. For a wedding ceremony if youre going to be late dont bother going, your entrance will almost undoubtedly take attention away from the bride and groom which is highly disrespectful IMO. Was there a reception afterwards? I would have still gone to that.

Yup there was a lunch thing after the engagement ceremony; the actual wedding isn't until January.

Originally Posted by hotcarl01

A Brioni eh, do you pack a Walther PPK like James Bond as well?? Do you bang 3 chicks per episode? Do you drink martini's?

^Typical class of 08/09 crap, be quiet child; the adults are talking.

Originally Posted by SK328CI

sent this to your girl:

Originally Posted by Mikeee46coupe

^Typical class of 08/09 crap, be quiet child; the adults are talking.

Lol, yes you are such an "adult", asking whether you're a jerk or not because you didn't go to a party because you'd be late, very adult like of you, sounds more like you're a child to me. And very "adult" of you having to point out the brand of suit you were wearing, you couldn't just say you were dressed already instead of "new Bironi". Joining fanatics in 08 doesn't mean I'm a kid, nor does it mean I'm new to BMW's, wake up.

For the record i'm 30 years old, far from a child.

Jerk? Maybe.. stupid decision? yes.

You have some growin up to do.

Originally Posted by hotcarl01

Lol, yes you are such an "adult", asking whether you're a jerk or not because you didn't go to a party because you'd be late, very adult like of you, sounds more like you're a child to me. And very "adult" of you having to point out the brand of suit you were wearing, you couldn't just say you were dressed already instead of "new Bironi". Joining fanatics in 08 doesn't mean I'm a kid, nor does it mean I'm new to BMW's, wake up.

For the record i'm 30 years old, far from a child.

^Typical class of 08/09 crap, be quiet child; the adults are talking.

Originally Posted by Coldintake

Jerk? Maybe.. stupid decision? yes.

You have some growin up to do.

Maybe; BUT I just spoke with my fiancee; turns out she walked in as the bride's entire family was waiting to "receive" the grooms family...she was embarrassed to say the least.

My perspective is for all the effort and preparation the family undertook (hours of cooking and expense) the very least a guest can do is arrive on time; rather than entering late and drawing attention away from the special day of those who were kind enough to invite you.

well at least it was just the engagement and not the actual wedding.... but wait... people of buddhist culture give/expect gifts for getting engaged

[QUOTE/]
Maybe; BUT I just spoke with my fiancee; turns out she walked in as the bride's entire family was waiting to "receive" the grooms family...she was embarrassed to say the least.[/quote]

As embarrassed as you should be next time you see either the bride or groom because you didn't go to the engagement party after being invited just because you didn't want to walk in a little late??? And to make it worse on your part you let your girlfriend walk in late all alone


Verdict is in, you're a jerk

Originally Posted by the xecutionr

well at least it was just the engagement and not the actual wedding.... but wait... people of buddhist culture give/expect gifts for getting engaged

I gave $500 and a nice card with a personal message written inside...yup sometimes the engagement party is even bigger than the wedding; time to convert; gifts galore!

Originally Posted by Mikeee46coupe

I gave $500 and a nice card with a personal message written inside...yup sometimes the engagement party is even bigger than the wedding; time to convert; gifts galore!

wtf... gifts at engagement.... 500 from just a couple that u are friends with.. imagine what the fam gave...

in los angeles, i'm used to having plenty of friends who are late all the time. thus, to not show up would have upset me since i would rather have you show up late as opposed to not at all.

plus, wtf are you serious about engagement parties being more significant than the wedding in some cases? my wedding in the future will def. be much more significant than my engagement party..