E46 BMW Social Directory E46 FAQ 3-Series Discussion Forums BMW Photo Gallery BMW 3-Series Technical Information E46 Fanatics - The Ultimate BMW Resource BMW Vendors General E46 Forum The Tire Rack's Tire Wheel Forum Forced Induction Forum The Off-Topic The E46 BMW Showroom For Sale, For Trade or Wanting to Buy

Welcome to the E46Fanatics forums. E46Fanatics is the premiere website for BMW 3 series owners around the world with interactive forums, a geographical enthusiast directory, photo galleries, and technical information for BMW enthusiasts.

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today!

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact contact us.

Go Back   E46Fanatics > Everything Else > The Off-Topic > General Off-Topic

General Off-Topic
Everything not about BMWs. Posts must be "primetime" safe and in good taste. You must be logged in to see sub-forums.
Click here to browse all new posts.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 09-19-2011, 01:48 PM   #81
yousharenow
Registered User
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: ATL
Posts: 213
My Ride: E46 ZHP
Send a message via AIM to yousharenow
First time, every time.

I can count on one hand the # of times I have used a condom
yousharenow is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 01:49 PM   #82
CMT247
Registered User
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: seattle
Posts: 74
My Ride: 07 VW GTI
Quote:
Originally Posted by SPDSKTR View Post
I don't even want to ask...

Okay. Maybe I do.

Do you rub pictures on yourself? Movie ticket stubs from previous dates?

"Oh yeah... that's it... rub that Fast & Furious all over me! MMMMMM YEAH! Oh, oh, OH! GONNA SHOOT MY NOSSSSSS!"
CMT247 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 02:21 PM   #83
217Bimmer
Registered User
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: IL
Posts: 143
My Ride: 2001 BMW 330i
Quote:
Originally Posted by SPDSKTR View Post
Neither. It's called way too much sex, son. Even the really tight stuff (tough to get two fingers in) doesn't faze me. I just keep on hammering away. No bullshit about it, dude. I've just trained myself to be an endurance king. My average session is about an hour. My longest was four and a half hours with one break to get some Gatorade and a snack.

Do you want a video or something? I don't know how else to prove it to you.

The only downside to it is that the chick gets frustrated when she's about worn out and I'm still going. "ARE YOU EVEN CLOSE?! JESUS CHRIST!"
what kind of *****s are you fvcking that let you bang them for hours on end? and what's the point of fvcking that long?

my goal is to nut as fast as possible and move on to eating dinner, watching football, or falling the fvck asleep.
217Bimmer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 02:25 PM   #84
ImPulSe
Registered User
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: NYC & Long Island
Posts: 751
My Ride: Bentley GT
Quote:
Originally Posted by 217Bimmer View Post
what kind of *****s are you fvcking that let you bang them for hours on end? and what's the point of fvcking that long?

my goal is to nut as fast as possible and move on to eating dinner, watching football, or falling the fvck asleep.


I'm sure she loves that.
ImPulSe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 02:28 PM   #85
SPDSKTR
Registered User
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Birmingham, AL, USA
Posts: 2,142
My Ride: E30 with an S52
Quote:
Originally Posted by 217Bimmer View Post
what kind of *****s are you fvcking that let you bang them for hours on end? and what's the point of fvcking that long?

my goal is to nut as fast as possible and move on to eating dinner, watching football, or falling the fvck asleep.
There's only been one chick to go 4 hours. The rest usually get me off orally because they get tired after an hour and a half.

What's the point? To be completely exhausted and pass the fuck out.
__________________

330i/Ci Bang for the Buck Horsepower Guide
Want 5% off any BimmerBrakes.com purchase? PM me for details!
SPDSKTR is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 02:37 PM   #86
DylloS
Registered User
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: NY
Posts: 672
My Ride: nothing
Quote:
Originally Posted by SPDSKTR View Post
There's only been one chick to go 4 hours. The rest usually get me off orally because they get tired after an hour and a half.

What's the point? To be completely exhausted and pass the fuck out.
what kind of ugly b1tches are you fuucking that can't get you off in 4 hours?
DylloS is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 02:39 PM   #87
217Bimmer
Registered User
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: IL
Posts: 143
My Ride: 2001 BMW 330i
Quote:
Originally Posted by DylloS View Post
what kind of ugly b1tches are you fuucking that can't get you off in 4 hours?
that's a better question.
217Bimmer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 02:43 PM   #88
new//M3fan
Registered User
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Reston, VA
Posts: 2,652
My Ride: 78' 924 87' E30
Quote:
Originally Posted by SPDSKTR View Post
There's only been one chick to go 4 hours. The rest usually get me off orally because they get tired after an hour and a half.

What's the point? To be completely exhausted and pass the fuck out.
I bet that chick was a 2 thinking she was a 7 and thinking you were a 10....
__________________
<-- Mango *F-BOMBS IN SIGS*
Bilstein HD's | E30 M3 FCAB's | H&R OE Sports | F+R strut bars | Self tuned 027 93 octane chip | KoseiK1's on R888's | + crazy OCD maintenance
new//M3fan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 02:52 PM   #89
SPDSKTR
Registered User
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Birmingham, AL, USA
Posts: 2,142
My Ride: E30 with an S52
Quote:
Originally Posted by DylloS View Post
what kind of ugly b1tches are you fuucking that can't get you off in 4 hours?
Quote:
Originally Posted by 217Bimmer View Post
that's a better question.
Quote:
Originally Posted by newe46fan View Post
I bet that chick was a 2 thinking she was a 7 and thinking you were a 10....


You just need the right mindset to go non-stop. "This chick is a slut, so I'm going to pound her like one." Whenever I choose to finally get off is when it happens. Besides... she's the one who brought it up. "Let's see how long we can go." No disagreement there. You have to maintain a level head and not think about it too much.

I don't see sex as a big deal... it's just something to do with a chick that feels great and can be fun. It's not an "emotional experience" where we "share our love" or whatever the crap you want to say. Emotionally, I'm desensitized to sex. Physically, I'm desensitized to sex. I choose when I want to get off. I can still have a quickie... but it's at least 15 to 20 minutes.
__________________

330i/Ci Bang for the Buck Horsepower Guide
Want 5% off any BimmerBrakes.com purchase? PM me for details!
SPDSKTR is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 03:07 PM   #90
dniper71
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Earth
Posts: 46
My Ride: A car
Quote:
Originally Posted by SPDSKTR View Post
Neither. It's called way too much sex, son. Even the really tight stuff (tough to get two fingers in) doesn't faze me. I just keep on hammering away. No bullshit about it, dude. I've just trained myself to be an endurance king. My average session is about an hour. My longest was four and a half hours with one break to get some Gatorade and a snack.

Do you want a video or something? I don't know how else to prove it to you.

The only downside to it is that the chick gets frustrated when she's about worn out and I'm still going. "ARE YOU EVEN CLOSE?! JESUS CHRIST!"
aren't you the guy who gets drunk alone on friday nights and then tells farrahjoon that you'll provide her with the kind of love and nurture she deserves, or am I mixing you up with someone else?
__________________
** Having a single animated non-BMW image in your sig it not allowed - Tim330i **
dniper71 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 03:11 PM   #91
SPDSKTR
Registered User
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Birmingham, AL, USA
Posts: 2,142
My Ride: E30 with an S52
Quote:
Originally Posted by dniper71 View Post
aren't you the guy who gets drunk alone on friday nights and then tells farrahjoon that you'll provide her with the kind of love and nurture she deserves, or am I mixing you up with someone else?
I'll get drunk alone on occasion... it's not a regular thing. As for The Joon, that was newe46fan. He wants to "get to know her" before smashing. I just told her I'd bang her.
__________________

330i/Ci Bang for the Buck Horsepower Guide
Want 5% off any BimmerBrakes.com purchase? PM me for details!
SPDSKTR is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 03:13 PM   #92
GRIFFIN
NWS
 
GRIFFIN's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: California
Posts: 1,694
My Ride: 04 330i zsp,zpp,zcw
__________________

** Removed - Please stop - Tim330i **
*NWS GIF REMOVED*
*GIF REMOVED*
* Continuing to put animated images in your sig will get you banned - Tim330i *
**You make me so horny.- Tim330i **
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hedges View Post
I can honestly say that because of Griffin, i am desensitized to alot of wierd stuff!
GRIFFIN is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 03:24 PM   #93
DylloS
Registered User
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: NY
Posts: 672
My Ride: nothing
Quote:
Originally Posted by SPDSKTR View Post


You just need the right mindset to go non-stop. "This chick is a slut, so I'm going to pound her like one." Whenever I choose to finally get off is when it happens. Besides... she's the one who brought it up. "Let's see how long we can go." No disagreement there. You have to maintain a level head and not think about it too much.

I don't see sex as a big deal... it's just something to do with a chick that feels great and can be fun. It's not an "emotional experience" where we "share our love" or whatever the crap you want to say. Emotionally, I'm desensitized to sex. Physically, I'm desensitized to sex. I choose when I want to get off. I can still have a quickie... but it's at least 15 to 20 minutes.
I still demand pics of your last few conquests.
DylloS is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 03:26 PM   #94
BMW_Matt
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Maryland
Posts: 13,066
My Ride: Has AWD
Quote:
Originally Posted by SPDSKTR View Post


You just need the right mindset to go non-stop. "This chick is a slut, so I'm going to pound her like one." Whenever I choose to finally get off is when it happens. Besides... she's the one who brought it up. "Let's see how long we can go." No disagreement there. You have to maintain a level head and not think about it too much.

I don't see sex as a big deal... it's just something to do with a chick that feels great and can be fun. It's not an "emotional experience" where we "share our love" or whatever the crap you want to say. Emotionally, I'm desensitized to sex. Physically, I'm desensitized to sex. I choose when I want to get off. I can still have a quickie... but it's at least 15 to 20 minutes.
"I don't lie about how long I can last, but when I do, I make sure it's an unheard of number..."
Quote:
Originally Posted by GRIFFIN View Post
BMW_Matt is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 03:26 PM   #95
SLVR JDM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Work
Posts: 1,519
My Ride: reclining rear seats
I have no interest in slamming away for 4 hours, lol

Anything more than 30 minutes and I give up. Forget it. 5 minutes is about average and I'm way ok with that. I'm not trying to set a record of any sort, haha.
__________________


** Removed **
SLVR JDM is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 04:10 PM   #96
speedcrazy1532
Registered User
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 721
My Ride: is over
Quote:
Originally Posted by SLVR JDM View Post
I have no interest in slamming away for 4 hours, lol

Anything more than 30 minutes and I give up. Forget it. 5 minutes is about average and I'm way ok with that. I'm not trying to set a record of any sort, haha.
^ Finally. Read through the whole thread of hicks and noobs and the last post I read is the only honest one.

Bunch of champs ITT. Would read again.
__________________

-Phil
speedcrazy1532 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 04:13 PM   #97
TayloMade[07]
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: 5312'N/10545'W
Posts: 48
My Ride: '12 Frontier Pro-4x
Quote:
Originally Posted by SPDSKTR View Post


You just need the right mindset to go non-stop. "This chick is a slut, so I'm going to pound her like one." Whenever I choose to finally get off is when it happens. Besides... she's the one who brought it up. "Let's see how long we can go." No disagreement there. You have to maintain a level head and not think about it too much.

I don't see sex as a big deal... it's just something to do with a chick that feels great and can be fun. It's not an "emotional experience" where we "share our love" or whatever the crap you want to say. Emotionally, I'm desensitized to sex. Physically, I'm desensitized to sex. I choose when I want to get off. I can still have a quickie... but it's at least 15 to 20 minutes.
any chick who ****s a dude who roller skates is a -6 in my books...
__________________
[Instro.Mental]
TayloMade[07] is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 04:15 PM   #98
TayloMade[07]
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: 5312'N/10545'W
Posts: 48
My Ride: '12 Frontier Pro-4x
wait wait... maybe SPDSKTR stands for SPEED SKEETER... don't lie eskimo pie - you've never gone 4 hours.



just playin'
__________________
[Instro.Mental]
TayloMade[07] is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 04:56 PM   #99
Sneaky
Registered User
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 4,951
My Ride: Fixie
Quote:
Originally Posted by SLVR JDM View Post
I have no interest in slamming away for 4 hours, lol

Anything more than 30 minutes and I give up. Forget it. 5 minutes is about average and I'm way ok with that. I'm not trying to set a record of any sort, haha.


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/collee..._b_101403.html
__________________
THE OFFICIAL BLACK SEDAN THREAD because Nothing breaks necks like a Black BMW.

Sig by So Lowww
Pictures I take
OVOxo till we overdose
Sneaky is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2011, 05:23 PM   #100
fd
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: San Mateo
Posts: 19
My Ride: 530, 2000 328i
Quote:
Originally Posted by Coldintake View Post
If she has a tattoo... she has/had a STD.
this ^^
__________________
2004 BMW 530, 2005 BMW 745
I had a back hair problem. I solved it with the
Razorba
fd is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Censor is ON





All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:01 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
(c) 1999 - 2011 performanceIX Inc - privacy policy - terms of use