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Old 03-26-2012, 12:40 PM   #21
casino is no lie
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It's not the end of the world if he doesn't.

If one or the other can afford the place by themselves and doesn't have to have two people on the lease, the breakup will only result in some awkward days of moving stuff out...

or in my case your crazy nutjob ex girlfriend jumping on your back after you get the last of it out and make your way for the door. That girl was craaaaazy.
Nothing is the end of the world, but that doesn't mean it won't be a world of misery. If you have to ask the driving reason behind it is finances, it's recipe for disaster.
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Old 03-26-2012, 12:43 PM   #22
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Is this like the Suze Ormond (sp?) thing where we get to approve or deny?

Me? I sort of agree with he who said you sound like you're going to do this anyway, so I'll propose that you just run a little experiment.

Live together totally for a few days--24 hrs. a day, or at least a solid weekend if you can arrange that.

Those little things that you think you'll find out about her that annoy you (and vice versa), you'll find out. Take those things and multiply them by 1,000,000 (for roomates)...by 1,000,000,000 if seriously considering marriage. Make it a stronger test and travel somewhere together for more than 3 days. Come back and report your findings!
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Old 03-26-2012, 12:44 PM   #23
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Nothing is the end of the world, but that doesn't mean it won't be a world of misery. If you have to ask the driving reason behind it is finances, it's recipe for disaster.
It was a driving reason behind my wife moving in with me. I was paying 800+ for a 2 bedroom, she was paying 600 for a 1 bedroom. Her lease was up and we said, you know it makes a lot more sense financially for her to pay 400 and me 400 by living together.

Life is all about risk and reward. If you don't take risk, there is no reward.
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Old 03-26-2012, 12:56 PM   #24
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So...you need a roommate, not a live in gf. You're moving in for all the wrong reasons.
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Money should never be a reason to move in with someone. Like Solly said, you need a roommate.

Caught the message yet?

It does work, sometimes. But you need a roommate, don't move in with a girl for financial reasons.
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Old 03-26-2012, 12:59 PM   #25
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It was a driving reason behind my wife moving in with me. I was paying 800+ for a 2 bedroom, she was paying 600 for a 1 bedroom. Her lease was up and we said, you know it makes a lot more sense financially for her to pay 400 and me 400 by living together.

Life is all about risk and reward. If you don't take risk, there is no reward.
You're playing Russian Roulette. You think the reward is not dying, and that you only can arrive at that conclusion by taking the risk. The fact is if you don't pull that trigger, you're still alive, and in the context of this thread you're still in the relationship.

If the driving reason for moving in with your significant other is for anything other than wanting to come home everyday to them and waking up every morning beside them, then it's for the wrong reasons. Finances isn't the benefits, it's a perk.
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Old 03-26-2012, 01:02 PM   #26
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Is this like the Suze Ormond (sp?) thing where we get to approve or deny?

Me? I sort of agree with he who said you sound like you're going to do this anyway, so I'll propose that you just run a little experiment.

Live together totally for a few days--24 hrs. a day, or at least a solid weekend if you can arrange that.

Those little things that you think you'll find out about her that annoy you (and vice versa), you'll find out. Take those things and multiply them by 1,000,000 (for roomates)...by 1,000,000,000 if seriously considering marriage. Make it a stronger test and travel somewhere together for more than 3 days. Come back and report your findings!
As I said before, we practically live together already. I spend 4 to 5 nights out of the week there, we have dinner 6 nights a week together... the situation wouldn't change all that much except we'd be together full-time and living somewhere we both want to. Where we live now, Walmart or Cracker Barrel is the most exciting thing we have to experience. It sucks.
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Old 03-26-2012, 01:05 PM   #27
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As I said before, we practically live together already. I spend 4 to 5 nights out of the week there, we have dinner 6 nights a week together... the situation wouldn't change all that much except we'd be together full-time and living somewhere we both want to. Where we live now, Walmart or Cracker Barrel is the most exciting thing we have to experience. It sucks.
Practically living together and living together is different. You no longer have personal space. You no longer can take a night off. You will be coming home every night to her and vice versa. There are a lot more finances you have to share. You'll have to start asking if it's okay to have friends over. You'll have to deal with her friends coming over.

People are very particular about the way they stack their dishes, how they arrange things in a bedroom, about how the bathrooms are used. There is a lot of compromise that has to be done.
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Old 03-26-2012, 01:10 PM   #28
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Practically living together and living together is different. You no longer have personal space. You no longer can take a night off. You will be coming home every night to her and vice versa. There are a lot more finances you have to share. You'll have to start asking if it's okay to have friends over. You'll have to deal with her friends coming over.

People are very particular about the way they stack their dishes, how they arrange things in a bedroom, about how the bathrooms are used. There is a lot of compromise that has to be done.
All valid points. These are things I'll definitely bring to the table to discuss.
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Old 03-26-2012, 01:17 PM   #29
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All valid points. These are things I'll definitely bring to the table to discuss.
Have fun watching porn and fapping in secrecy.
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Old 03-26-2012, 01:36 PM   #30
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She's codependent, and OP enjoys her dependency. She also enjoys that she can control OP using her dependency and his weaknesses. She's been looking for a guy like you OP, and you're playing right into her ruse.

Build the relationship before you start thinking financially.
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Old 03-26-2012, 02:22 PM   #31
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The bad part now is that you know you shouldn't do it but telling your gf is going to be a big mess.
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Old 03-26-2012, 02:34 PM   #32
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The bad part now is that you know you shouldn't do it but telling your gf is going to be a big mess.
I can see it now. He doesn't outright tell her he doesn't think it's a good idea, he'll start suggesting ideas as to why it wouldn't hoping she'll reach that conclusion herself. Instead she takes it personally, becomes defensive and and then upset. He'll start to panic because he doesn't want to hint to her that he thinks it's a bad idea, and quickly back pedals by saying how he's looking forward to it and thinks it's a great idea.

Moments later he'll hear a voice in his head say, "Oh ****... what did I just do?"
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Old 03-26-2012, 02:35 PM   #33
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Have fun watching porn and fapping in secrecy.
I'll send you a video. Won't be so secret anymore.

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The bad part now is that you know you shouldn't do it but telling your gf is going to be a big mess.
Nothing's final yet in either direction. There is still a lot to discuss and figure out before any decisions are made.
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Old 03-26-2012, 02:45 PM   #34
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Nothing's final yet in either direction. There is still a lot to discuss and figure out before any decisions are made.
It's final in her mind. You're forgetting women don't think like men. Once an idea has been implanted in their minds, it's virtually impossible to remove. They made a movie about it.


*** spoiler alert ***








































She commits suicide.
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Old 03-26-2012, 02:49 PM   #35
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I'll send you a video. Won't be so secret anymore. <img src='http://forum.E46Fanatics.com/images/smilies/greddy.gif'>



Nothing's final yet in either direction. There is still a lot to discuss and figure out before any decisions are made.
It's not final yet but you're obviously leaning towards moving in and her mind is probably set on that.
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Old 03-26-2012, 03:29 PM   #36
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After 5 months you have no idea who someone is.
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Old 03-26-2012, 03:30 PM   #37
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After 5 months you have no idea who someone is.
lol look at us. A year in I was like this is it!

edit: this sounds like we were dating hahha

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Old 03-26-2012, 03:30 PM   #38
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It's not final yet but you're obviously leaning towards moving in and her mind is probably set on that.
Yup, you'd have done better contemplating it alone. Once you said something to her and she got excited you screwed yourself. Sorry boss.
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Old 03-26-2012, 03:31 PM   #39
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lol look at us. A year in I was like this is it!
Learning from mistakes and all that...
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Old 03-30-2012, 12:17 AM   #40
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gf of 6months was hinting at this a few weeks ago... something along the lines of "let's just get it over with."

Just seems fast man, what is the rush?

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